Monday, October 8, 2007

5 things I cannot live without

OK!! I might be able to survive, but my life would be so miserable that I haven't even though about it!!'s the list:
1. My bed: She (yes..that's how I address HER) might not be the most comfortable, or as a matter of fact, she surely isn't the best looking bed in the world. She sort of talks back to me in some alien language whenever I toss around, complaining about my ever increasing weight. Yet, she has been faithful to me, carrying all the burdens by herself and never even once thought of deserting me. And on top of that, I have to say that I spent the best (but not so productive) part of my life on her.

2. My cell: I haven't the faintest idea when I started becoming so dependent on my cell. It was, maybe, like four years back when my dad presented me a Nokia 6610. Actually, I declined it initially cos my mom wouldn't raise my allowance for the extra phone bills. This model was with me for around a year, and unfortunately, the company could not give warranty for dropping it in a bucket of water, for bouncing it up and down on a concrete floor etc. And like everything else in this world, the day came when we had to part ways. Now I own a Nokia 6681. The phone's good, but the bill isn't!!

3. Pork : Althought people consider me to be an "Anytarian", I consider pork to be the best among them all!! And mind u I'm not just simply saying this. I have tasted elephants, deers, wild boars, dogs, apes and a host of others which a normal person might consider unedible, but nothing comes close to pork. Make it any style you want, I don't long as its cooked. I consider it to be God's blessing that in a land of hindus, where swine butchers are far and few, I only have to walk for two minutes to get my daily dose!!(Hear that??..Chhama)

4. Tea : "You should never say no to Jesus and tea!!" Very true!! I have no idea who thought of this simple, yet inspiring phrase. But what I meant by tea here doesn't include 'bina chini' and 'laal chai'!! The 'chai patti' should be of a good brand, the 'dhood' and 'chini' in adequate proportions. 'Bina chini' and 'laal chai' are for the rich, diabetic, hypertensive, overweight and lazy show-offs trying to act as if they are health-concious.

5. God : Many person out there might choke on their food, or laugh their guts out when they hear this. Yes, I agree. I am no Noah, or a matter of fact, not even close to Judas!! But I believe that God is always there for me, although I never do the same for Him. Where would I be today without Him? I shiver as I think about it...

Wednesday, October 3, 2007

Which is more disgusting-to be peed on or to be spit at?


ot so tough to it? Who would ever want to be peed on? Right?! But think again..Assuming that a person does not carry any infections in his urinary tract, urine is sterile!! i.e., there aren't any pathogenic organisms. Whereas a normal healthy person harbours thousands of micro-organisms in his oral cavity most of the time. So, if I was to choose between life and death, I would definitely ask to be peed on rather than being contaminated with spit!!